A father's perspective

(Written in 1997)

Pity the poor father whose son becomes mentally ill.

The boy tends to focus on his mother, she pours all her maternal affections on him and the father becomes marginalised and doubly disempowered.

Another father told me: 'This will affect your marriage', and the subtext to his words was tragic and powerful.

Thank goodness our relationship had been strong enough in the past to cope with serious crises, and this crisis now did not destroy our relationship, not least because we were able to talk frankly.

But where were the so-called professionals in all this?

Marriages have been needlessly destroyed because of a lack of proper support for carers.

(Written in 1997 by the father of a young man with schizophrenia.)